I worry about her weight, her temperature, her color, her poop, breastfeeding, her sleeping habits, her feisty little habit of rolling to one side during sleep and just about anything else you could think to worry about. I fear losing her.
There are also some things, ugly and dark things, that I had no idea were hiding inside me that have come out since bringing our first child home. I don't think I can articulate them well today and I don't know if I want to. I'm embarrassed and ashamed and burdened with guilt over them. I am struggling with so many things that I didn't think I would ever struggle with and honestly, I thought I was above them. I was so prideful.
I'm not sure if I'm making any sense, but the main point I guess is that I need Jesus today just as much as I did when I carried this little girl in my womb.
There really isn't a good way to transition, but isn't that just like joy and sorrow? They coexist, side by side.
Because you asked and because she's the cutest little baby girl in the whole world- here are some pictures from our first week home.